Dear Jacob
by seraphinaspice
Summary: A series of letters Bella posts to Jacob on his birthday, until the day he stops writing back. Writing this fic made me cry. So I appreciate all feedback!


**Title: **Dear Jacob  
**Author: ****seraphina****  
Rating:**PG  
**Spoilers: **Read New Moon  
**Warnings: **Extreme angst.  
**Pairing (if any): **Jacob/Bella.  
**Summary: **A series of letters Bella posts to Jacob on his birthday, until the day he stops writing back. Writing this fic made me cry. So I appreciate all feedback!

_Jacob aged 17_

Dear Jacob,

When you're reading this, know that I'm thinking of you.

It was never meant to end like this. We were meant to marry and have two children. A little boy and a little girl. We were meant to live in La Push with a cottage, with a white picket fence. We were meant to make love while the kids were at school.

I still remember how you used to kiss me. I miss you so much. How is Charlie?

It's been a year now, since I've left. You're seventeen now and still incredibly handsome. I hope that you're not breaking too many hearts.

I'm sorry things ended this way. I've included a return postal address. I know you're still mad at me, but please write back.

Love always,  
Bells

_Dear Bells,_

_I'm still mad at you, but I'll write back because you asked me to. Things are ok at La Push. Your dad's doing ok._

_How is Edward doing? Bet he's glad he got you in the end. Stupid bloodsucker. No offence._

_Love,  
Jake_

_Jacob aged 18_

Dear Jake,

You're 18! Happy birthday.

Edward is doing ok. We argue every now and then, but that's normal for every couple. I guess. Except he's like a hundred years older than me and uses that against me sometimes.

Love always,  
Bells.

_Dearest Bells,_

_I miss you. Can't you visit, once a year? That way I get to see you instead of just smell your scent on these letters. I miss your smile. Your laugh. The way you kept falling over your feet._

_Love always,  
Jake.  
_

_Jacob aged 21_

Dear Jake,

Congratulations! You're 21. Hope you celebrated safely. Don't get into too much trouble. Edward thinks I'm crazy for worrying so much about you. But hey, he doesn't love you!

Love always,  
Bells

_Dearest Bells,_

_I had an okay birthday celebration. The boys wanted to go paint the town red, but I wasn't interested. I missed you so bad I almost threw up. Or maybe it was the beer. I bet it was both._

_I love you,  
Jake  
_

_Jacob aged 25_

Dear Jake,

I miss you. How are things? I'm missing out on what are probably the most exciting years of your young adult life. I think of you always. It's only a matter of time before you meet someone nice, I'm sure of it.

Love always,  
Bells

_Dearest Bells,_

_Life is getting better. I imprinted. At last. Her name is Lisa. She's a vet and has a pretty smile. Red hair and green eyes. You'd like her._

_We're getting married next week. I wish you could come._

_Love,  
Jake_

_Jacob aged 30_

Dear Jake,

How are you? Congratulations on the baby boy. I bet she's beautiful, just like her mother. Cherish this gift of life. Edward and I can never have a child.

Love always,  
Bells

_Dearest Bells,_

_I can't believe I'm a father, but there you are. Billy is a feisty boy. Lisa is patient with him. She's a good mother. I know you would be too. In a different world._

_I wonder, every day, what would have happened if you had chosen me instead._

_Love always,  
Jake  
_

_Jacob aged 40_.

Dear Jake,

I hope you're well. Four kids! Well done. I bet they're all smart and kind. And very good-looking.

Love always,  
Bells

_  
Dearest Bells,_

_Yeah, four kids. It's crazy, how busy life gets, trying to juggle everything. I wouldn't have it any other way though. Lisa is just amazing in how she helps organise things._

_She's so kind to me, Bells. I love her. But you stole my heart first.  
_  
_Love always,  
Jake_

_Jacob aged 50_

Dear Jake,

Congratulations on being half a century years old! I bet you're still handsome and strapping. You've got three grand children too! Bella, Charlie and Renee. I like how you chosen their names.

Love always,  
Bells

_Dear Bells,_

_When did I become old enough to become a grand dad? It's so weird. I look exactly the same as I always do. Twenty five years or so. But I'm getting older. I feel it. I am aging. Slowly. Do you age too?_

_I miss you._

_Love always,  
Jake_

_Jacob aged 60  
_  
Dear Jake,

I'm aging, just as you are. Except I will never taste death the way you do. I mourn for that eternal slumber, which I will never get.

Love always,  
Bells

_Dearest Bells,_

_Don't long for death, beloved. It will come, at its own pace. Perhaps it is different for vampires, but in the end, you, too will find rest._

_I see you in my dreams. Each night.  
_  
_Love always,  
Jake_

_Jacob aged 70  
_  
Dear Jake,

I cry each night. Inconsolably. Edward is helpless in the face of my grief. I miss you, and I know that your time on this earth is running out.

Love always,  
Bells

_Dearest Bells,_

_Please visit me. For old times' sake._

_Love always,  
Jake_

_Jacob aged 80_

Dear Jake,

I know that you're probably getting weary of life as you read this.

I'm coming to visit you.

Love always,  
Bells.

_She arrives soon after he reads the letter. He is resting on his armchair. She slips into his home the way she did when they were teenagers._

_He smiles and opens his eyes._

_'Hi Bells,' he whispers._

_She smiles back, and starts to cry._

_'I've waited decades for this moment,' he says. She kneels beside him and rests her head on his lap. He runs his fingers slowly through her hair._

_The sound of small footsteps._

_'Grandpa?' a small girl with dark hair and brown eyes asks. 'Who is that lady?'_

_'This is Bella Swan,' he smiles, 'the girl I named you after.'_

_Little Bella looks up at Big Bella in awe. 'So you're the real Bella,' she whispers. 'Grandpa loves you very much.'_

_Bella continues to weep, and draws the young girl into a fond embrace._

_'Are you taking good care of Grandpa?'_

_The girl gives an impish smile. 'I try.' She skips away._

_Jacob stands up and they sit together on the couch._

_'Remember all those movies we used to watch?' He chuckles, nodding._

_'How is Edward?'_

_She smiles. 'He is well. He sends you his regards. And his apologies, for keeping me away for so long.'_

_He smiles, sighing softly. 'Tell him all is forgiven. We have tonight.'_

_She closes her eyes. 'Alice tells me that tonight will be your last.'_

_'Oh,' he says, not at all surprised. 'I had a feeling that would happen. We had a big family dinner last night. I told everyone I loved them. Finalised my will. I'm ready to move on. Except I hadn't said goodbye to you.'_

_She cries again. 'Oh Jake. How am I going to live the rest of eternity without you?'_

_He kisses her tears away. 'I'm with you, Bells. I always have been. Always will be. Love me, and you will always find me.'_

_Trembling, she lifts her wrist. 'I still have the bracelet you gave me.'_

_He smiles. 'I've made you more.' He brings out a box. 'I made one, for each of your birthdays.'_

_She opens up the box and scoops out beautiful trinkets. Wolves. Vampires. Suns. Moons. Each one lovingly carved. 'Thank you,' she whispers. 'I will keep these for eternity.'_

_He sighs. Kisses her. It tastes like goodbye._

_'I love you, Bella Swan.'_

_'I love you, Jacob Black.'_

_He rests his head on her lap...and falls into eternal sleep._

_She hears the pack howl their final farewell, over the breaking of her eternal heart._

_Lisa hugs her the following morning._

_'Thank you for coming, Bella,' she smiles, through her tears. 'Jacob told me all about you. He loved you so much, and missed you even more.' She closes her eyes. 'I'm so glad he got to spend his final night with you.'_

_'I'm so sorry,' Bella whispers, and she's crying too. 'He loved you. Deeply. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for being his lover and companion. You brought him so much joy.'_

_The funeral was simple._

_Bella stayed long after._

_Edward came to get her. He said hello to the Black family._

_Little Bella smiled radiantly when he kissed her cheek. 'You're quite the pretty young lady, Bella!'_

_'Goodbye, Jacob Black,' Edward whispers, placing a bouquet of fresh flowers on his grave._

_He hugs Bella, and they walk away._

_THE END_


End file.
